I cannot tell you how many times people have told me everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we have to wait for the reason for a long time. This statement seems to boggle my mind because when certain things happen you wonder what could possibly be the reason. It's when you have to rely on God to show you what the reason could be.
Last week I went to the Garden State Walk for Hearing. I volunteered at the Advanced Bionics table. On our car ride there I had a moment. A moment when the normalcy of our lives brings me to tears. After all isn't that what we all want for families? The boys were in the truck having a conversation. I had the radio on. Adele came on the radio and it was "Rolling in the Deep". It is one of Cormac's favorite songs. When I hear it I automatically smile because I know how he loves it. I glanced into the backseat and there he was tapping his foot to the beat. Singing all the words all while making a teardrop bracelet on the rainbow loom. I cried. In that exact moment I felt pure joy. I thought "Good gosh, look at him." He didn't appear to be putting an extra effort into doing anything. He was just a kid doing what he loves to do! I am not sure why it made me cry but certain things just hit you.
I had an amazing day at the walk. I had a day where perhaps I learned a reason. When we arrived at Garden State Walk for Hearing I felt like I was at home. I was in my element. I was surrounded by people who understood me. People who got me. They have walked in my shoes or are following in our footsteps. They are following in Cormac's footsteps. And those are some pretty freakin amazing footsteps. I know I am his Mother but I have to admit he is an unbelievable child. I had a parent tell me when she met Cormac for the first time and her daughter was just a baby it was the moment she knew her daughter would be OK and would get a cochlear implant. I had another Mom so happy to see Cormac and let him meet her family so they knew what their son's future would be.
All of this from Cormac. One little seven year old. One little boy who came into this world in total silence. For one entire year his world was quiet. His world was quiet but his personality was never quiet. He was always the happiest baby and always smiling. To think, he didn't hear ANYTHING...not even my voice to soothe him if he was upset or me telling him I love him devastated me. He on the other hand doesn't remember not hearing. When I tell him he didn't hear he finds it hard to believe. He has no memory of not hearing. (Well, if he did remember it would be a miracle considering he was one when he was implants LOL).
One little boy who opened our world to a world we knew nothing about. Today, I was surrounded by people who we have met along our journey. People I know and love. People I NEVER would have known if not for Cormac. Today we saw friends whose children started this journey with us and are just as inspirational as Cormac. Children who had now words when they first met and now never stop talking! We saw teachers who work tirelessly to give our children their voices. People who gave Frank and I the resources and support we needed to travel this path. We saw little ones who are in the beginning of their journey and there it is. The reason. Cormac is the reason. Cormac was born to give Hope to others. I honestly believe Cormac was put on this earth to inspire others. To lead through example. To just be Cormac. And just being Cormac is more than I could ever ask for. Another friend asked me if he knows how influential he is when parents meet him. I said he doesn't. He is just being him. His enthusiasm and love of life speaks for itself.
I attended his parent teacher conference this week as well. As expected he is doing great in school but here is a direct quote from his teacher "He loves to answer questions. He is the first to raise his hand. He is the first to volunteer to READ OUT LOUD to the class. He asks questions when he doesn't understand and he asks for things to be repeated if he doesn't hear it" I am pretty sure this is the dream of any deaf child to get this report from the teacher. He is reading, he is speaking outloud and advocating for himself when he doesn't hear!
So, all those years ago when I didn't understand it. I think I see it clearly now. Cormac's reason or purpose was to inspire and help others who are travelling the same road. He was put on this earth to give hope to other parents who are terrified when they find out their child is deaf. When they have no clue what to do and question every single aspect of their child's future. He is here to ease those fears and show everyone how just perfectly normal life will be for them. I could not be happier for him and I am truly, truly blessed to be able to be his Mom and witness his purpose.
