Thursday, January 31, 2013
The love of a brother and a sister
Anyone who knows us since Calleigh was born knows Ciaran has been slightly obsessed with Calleigh since the day she came home. He was totally fascinated by her from the first moment he saw her through the glass into the NICU. I remember holding her up and showing her to the boys and while they were all excited Ciaran just had a different reaction. It was immediate love and devotion.
When Calleigh finally made it home he was always all over her. I must have said a million times "Ciaran, get out of the baby's face". He just couldn't help himself. He has to be all in her space all the time. When she was about three months old we went to the mall. Calleigh still had her cleft lip. Naturally, people looked at her. Most people are surprised to see a baby with some type of deformity. It never bothered me but people did look twice at her. At the very young age of 3 years and six months Ciaran realized people were looking at her differently. As we strolled through the mall he stopped me and said "Mom, I weally don't like all these people wooking at my sister". I was so shocked he could tell people were looking at her differently. It was in that moment I realized Calleigh would be protected for the rest of her life. Regardless of her age no one will ever be able to treat her badly. There would be consequences doled out by not one but probably three over protective brothers.
As Calleigh gets bigger he continues to smother her with his LOVE. With all of her trips to the hospital he would get so upset. He would cry and ask me if she was going to die. He would pray for her at night and tell God how much he loves her.
I'd say the past 1 1/2 years he would drive her crazy. She would push him away, swat at him and tell him no. All he wanted was for her to reciprocate all the love. He would say "Mom, why doesn't she like me? I just love her". Even though she pushed him away he still persisted. He never gave up hugging her, kissing her, carrying her but most of all just loving her.
Now, you know we took her off gluten for sensory issues. This was part of the problem with him always being near her. She didn't want him touching her all the time. When she wanted attention it was fine but when she didn't....LOOK OUT. A few months ago he started filling her sippy cup with milk for her. (This is the fastest way to get Calleigh to love you)
For the past three weeks things have changed. She suddenly loves him just as much as he loves her. It's been a transformation. She hugs him. She kisses him. She asks him to get her her milk. She will now only take a bath if he goes with her. When I change her diaper she says "Ciaran, lay with me". To see the pure joy on his face is priceless. He keeps saying "Mom, she really loves me". She holds his hand. She lays on top of him. As I type this she is playing hide and seek with her brothers. She just found Ciaran and tackled him.
She is also smart enough to use it to her advantage. She wants for nothing. All she has to do is ask Ciaran and he will do it. She knows this. She uses it. But Ciaran is just so happy she is giving him attention he doesn't care what her motives are.
She has made so many changes lately and Ciaran is her biggest supporter. He cheers and claps for her. He carries her around. He stays behind her on the stairs to make sure she is safe. When she says something he says "Wow, Mom she said that so clear. SHe is getting so much better". She loves to dance with him. Their brother/sister relationship might be the cutest thing I have ever seen.
The past few weeks have brought so many changes to our lives. Drastic changes to Calleigh in so many ways. While I am so grateful for all of these positive changes. Watching Calleigh and Ciaran together has made me the happiest I could possibly be. I honestly feel she has loved him the same all along but wasn't capable of all the affection or attention. She couldn't handle it. She now embraces it and it warms my heart and soul.
God Bless any boy that EVER tries to date her. Seriously, he will have to get through three brothers first but his biggest obstacle will for sure be Ciaran. I hope they always have such a magical relationship.